You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
