I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize