quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
