Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
