Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
