I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
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