Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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