This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
