This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Too much gin, very little bucket
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
