Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
