Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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