you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
