Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
