I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize