I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
