i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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