We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
