Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize