i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Just invented taco cereal.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
