you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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