Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
