make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
