He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
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