i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
