even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize