I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
and you fell through a lawn chair
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
