So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Randomize
