So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
