At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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