Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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