Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
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