omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
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