nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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