dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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