A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
