The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Less talking, more tequila
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
