Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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