make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
