Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
