I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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