just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
