YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
