Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize