just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
