How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
