you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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