He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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