hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
