I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize