you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize