You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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